Archive for the ‘blogging’ Category

Out of My Darkness

Posted: May 22, 2013 in bereavement, blogging, death, family, friendship, life, love, pray, prayer, religion
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Following on from yesterday’s blog post where I talked about how I’m beginning to dislike lying in bed trying to sleep, I have been reminded of the following song:

Out of my darkness God called me,
Out of the death of my night,
Out of the shadows of sorrow,
Into the life of his light.
 
Out of my darkness he called me,
Out of my doubt, my despair,
Out of the wastes of my winter,
Into the spring of his care.
 
Out of my darkness he called me
Into his sunshining day,
Out of my gloom to his glory;
What could I do but obey?
 
Out of your darkness he calls you,
Out of your doubt, your despair,
Out of the wastes of your winter,
Into the spring of his care.
by John Gowans

I pray regularly that God will give me the strength to get through these days, and although I may still be finding it difficult to not get upset because my Dad has passed away, I believe I would be finding this even more difficult if God wasn’t supporting me.

Therefore, I urge you to talk to God about all that concerns, worries or upsets you, as He, and He alone can truly give you the strength and the encouragement to face each day.

out-of-darkness

 

It’s Too Quiet

Posted: May 11, 2013 in blogging, family, friendship, life, love, words
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enjoy-the-silenceI know I’ve talked before about how some folk just seem to have their volume control turned up to full all the time, but there are in fact some times when the quietness can be just as uncomfortable…

Ever noticed how many of us don’t like it when it’s quiet, when no-one is talking? Funny how someone always feels the need to break that quietness…usually with something completely unrelated to any previous discussion, and in many occasions trying to be funny but completely failing!

Have you ever noticed how there are some people you can sit in silence with for ages and never feel uncomfortable with? They are the folk you love and trust, and that is why silence is so easy to cope with and not uncomfortable at all.

So, yes, there are some times when quietness or silence is uncomfortable, but then there are also some situation where the silence is just so natural. Hold onto those relationships where silences are comfortable as they are your important and valuable relationships.

silence-speaks

Managing Grief #6

Posted: May 9, 2013 in bereavement, blogging, death, dementia, family, friendship, holiday, life, love
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It’s been a few weeks since I posted anything in my “Managing Grief” series, but it’s not because there was nothing more to suggest, simply I couldn’t write the words down. As many of you will know, there have been two bereavements in my own family in the last couple of months (my Dad and my aunt), and I think it’s only been in the last few weeks that I’ve begun to truly grieve for them.

Anyway, onto today’s thoughts on how to manage your grief…

Be realistic in your expectations.

In Finding Your Way After Your Spouse Dies by Marta Felber, Marta writes the following:

My loved one died on January 25. Almost immediately, I began to dread the next Christmas without him, exactly 11 months away!

The way in which she coped with her anxiety about the coming Christmas was to plan carefully and keep her expectations realistic:

“Try to have reasonable expectations. There are important ways in which celebrations will not, and cannot, ever be the same again. So it is okay to plan for them to be different. Be realistic about what you can handle, both physically and emotionally. Be kind to yourself and nurturing.”

Elderly woman sitting in an armchairI can truly relate to those sentiments, as my Dad died on 21st February this year, and just a couple of weeks ago, on the 25th April, we had to cope with my Dad’s first birthday since he passed away. It was awful knowing that for the first time in my life we didn’t have to wonder what to buy Dad for his birthday, but, more importantly, we wouldn’t even be celebrating the day with Dad anymore. The 25th April was a working day for me, and I can truthful tell you that I don’t know how I got through that day at work in one piece as my heart was most definitely with Dad.
I can only imagine how hard it was for Mum. However to make sure Mum wasn’t on her own all day, feeling sorry for herself and getting upset as Dad was no longer here, we took her out at night for a meal…not to celebrate Dad’s birthday but just to remember Dad on what would have been his special day. It turned out though that Mum had actually been out most of the day, as in the afternoon, she apparently went down to the nursing home Dad had been in (and died in), and spent time there with the nurses who had cared for, and looked after Dad so well during his time there.
We got through the first of our significant days since our two bereavements by setting realistic expectations, so I know it will work, so please try this for yourself.

Mentoring

Posted: May 3, 2013 in blogging, children, family, friendship, language, life, management, personnel characteristics, religion, school, words
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Well, just like yesterday (in Manners), I’m going to have a moan…

In many areas of our lives we can find ourselves “mentoring” others in what they should be saying and doing and how they should be saying or doing it, both at work, in our family lives as well as with our friends.

During our lifetimes, it’s been proven that we can be influenced the most when we are children. So here’s my question for you today…are you mentoring your children, and those you come into contact with, in your bad habits, or are you mentoring them in God‘s way?

politenessWhy am I asking this? Well (here’s my moan), my main reason is, just like yesterday, my concerns over the way our society has changed over the last years. It feels to me, that even during my lifetime, and I’m not that old, that the basic standards of decency and politeness have all but disappeared from our society.

Where is our respect for others?

Why are we no longer willing to help a stranger in need?

These are just a couple of questions to highlight my concerns, but the bottom line is, if we want our society to change for the better, it’s down to us to be the example of decency that others need to see. Jesus wants us to be Christ-like in all we do, so take up that challenge today by acting how Jesus would have acted, by being polite, honest, decent and caring in all you do.

Effective Prayer #2

Posted: April 21, 2013 in bible, blogging, friendship, life, love, music, pray, prayer, religion, Salvation Army, words
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1 John 5:14 (NKJV)

Now this is the confidence that we have in Him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us.

Yesterday in Effective Prayer #1 I touched on the fact that God hears our every prayer. Today, I want to remind you that in order to pray effectively, we must fully believe and understand that God has the power to do what we are not capable of doing for ourselves. i.e. He alone can answer our prayers.

Mark 11:24 (NKJV)

Therefore I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them.

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God’s Plan or Our Own Desires?

Posted: April 20, 2013 in bereavement, blogging, death, Facebook, family, friendship, Health, homeless, life, love, personnel characteristics, prayer, religion, Social Networking, Twitter, words
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I had a bit of a rant on Thursday night on Twitter and Facebook after reading several posts some Christian friends had posted in their timeline on Facebook. I ended up apologising later for my comments as I receiving several private messages from others who accused me of dismissing things which others felt were important to them, just because I felt they weren’t important – this couldn’t have been further from the truth or further from the reason for my rant in the first place!

GODS PLAN

I do know and do understand that we all consider different things to be important and meaningful to us and this wasn’t the part that annoyed me about the original posts. What annoyed me was actually the wording of the posts, where they described what can only be considered to be standard life events and therefore, in my opinion, their comments were very over the top.

Had you not read the whole posts made by these people, you would have thought they had received some life threatening or life altering news, when in fact, the events referred to were only ones which, would affect their lives…but only to the extent of giving them a little more work to do on a daily basis and would require a bit more planning from them, not the significant life changing impact implied by their pleads for our thoughts/prayers for them.

Sorry this all sounds a bit cryptic, but I obviously don’t want to be too specific about the posts I’m referring to as I certainly do not want to upset/annoy anyone anymore than I may already have done.

gods_planMy main objection to their posts was actually that they wanted us to pray for a specific outcome to an event as any other outcome would make things very difficult for them. I should explain that the posts I’m referring to were made by Christians, and therefore I have to question why were they asking us to pray for an outcome they wanted to a specific event? i.e. Was the outcome they desired actually God’s plan for their lives or simply their own plans/desires, because the outcome they wanted would make their life easier?

Maybe I just found all this annoying because I’m feeling so emotional and sensitive just now as I’m still trying to come to terms with the bereavement of two close family members since the end of February, plus several other major issues/concerns. Yes, I maybe shouldn’t have reacted as I did in such a public forum, but the posts just seem to be such a kick in the teeth to the many people we all know of, who are having to cope with major life changing or life threatening events in their lives…and what about all those in this world who find it a daily struggle to feed, clothe and put a roof over the heads of those they love!

The bottom line is, choose your words carefully when you are looking for support from others, as pleading for prayerful support for situations where God’s plan in your life seems to have been completely forgotten or ignored, is not the way prayer should be utilised. Pray for God’s will to be done in your life, not plead with God to allow your desires to be granted.

Let’s make sure we talk to God about His plans for our lives, accept His plans and not plead with Him to chance His plans just because it suits us better.

If it wasn’t for my faith…

Posted: April 14, 2013 in bereavement, blogging, death, dementia, family, finance, friendship, Health, heaven, hospital, life, love, music, pray, religion, stroke
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Have you ever wondered how your life would have turned out and how you would have coped with life , if you hadn’t accepted Christ as your saviour?

I have, particularly in these last few weeks as we’ve had to cope with the death of first my Dad and then my Aunt Mae.faith

Just after my Dad passed away, someone said to me that, “There are only two certainties on life, one that you have been born, and secondly, that you will die” – Despite this, we all find the death of a loved one very upsetting and difficult to cope with.

It’s therefore no surprise to me that during these difficult and stressful weeks, I’ve relied heavily on God to keep me strong for my Mum and focused enough make all the required arrangements etc. So much so, I actually feel as if I’ve been running on auto-pilot for weeks now, as every day seems to have been a bit of a blur and I’m not sure I can actually tell you what I did on any particular day since the middle of February!

That said, I’m not sure I would have been able to get through these weeks if God hadn’t been there with me, as there were times when I honestly felt I couldn’t cope with any more problems, but as you can tell, I got through those days, and that I simply put down to the fact that my faith reassured me that God is with me at all times, and is helping me when my own strength has gone.

Today I thank God for my faith. Without Him, these last few weeks would have been even harder to face than they were.

Another Farewell

Posted: April 11, 2013 in bereavement, blogging, children, church, death, dementia, family, Food, friendship, Glasgow, Glasgow, Health, heaven, life, love, religion, Rutherglen, Salvation Army, stroke
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It’s been another sad day today, as just 5 weeks after saying our final farewells to my Dad, we said a final farewell to my Aunt Mae, Mary Waddell Gilchrist (23/10/1922 – 03/04/2013).

Aunt Mae (Aug 2011)

My intention again today, just at it had been on the day of my Dad’s funeral (see the blog post Farewell), was to write a tribute to my Aunt Mae, but I’m afraid again it’s just too soon for me to be able to write anything that would do her justice. At some point in the coming weeks I hope to write tributes to both Dad and Aunt Mae, but for today I simply want to say thank you.

Thank you to so many of you who have offered words of comfort and solace to me, Mum and Sandy over these last few weeks as first we lost my Dad, and then my Aunt Mae. I really can’t express strongly enough just how much your support in person, by phone and/or card, has meant to us all.

To those of you who have helped us get everything sorted out for today, I’d like to say a huge thank you to you.

To the many of you who shared with us today at Rutherglen Salvation Army for the service of thanksgiving, then at Rutherglen cemetery, and then afterwards back at Rutherglen Salvation Army for refreshments, thank you for taking the time to support us on this most difficult of days, as I’m sure it was very much appreciated by all my family. I’m sure my Aunt Mae would have been embarrassed by all that has been said about her today, but as far as I’m concerned, it simply shows the huge impact and influence Aunt Mae had on the many people she met during her lifetime.

I’ll miss you Aunt Mae, and just as I said about my Dad a few weeks ago, I will never ever forget you.

Rest in peace Aunt Mae xxx

Calling

Posted: April 9, 2013 in blogging, computing, Employment, life, love, management, music, religion, Salvation Army, words
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Your career makes a living but your calling makes your life.

So today’s question for you is twofold:

  1. Is your career fulfilling your ambitions?
  2. Have you accepted your calling?

As far as my first question is concerned, many find themselves falling into a particular job or career simply because of circumstances, i.e. It was the only job they could get, while others may have following a childhood dream, or through their academic achievements found certain opportunities opened for them.

Now my second question is for me the more interesting one, as in order to accept your calling, you have to first listen to God as He directs you , and then choose to accept the plan He has for your life.

It may be difficult to change your career, particularly given the current economic climate and lack of job opportunities at present. However it is never too late to say, “Yes”, to God’s calling. So whether you’ve been swithering for a short time, or ignoring God for years, it’s not too late to accept God’s calling now, today!

I hope you enjoy listening to the International Staff Songsters of the Salvation Army singing Christ Calls, as the message in this song, reinforces what I’ve written in this blog post:


Alive and Well

Posted: April 2, 2013 in blogging, cross, death, Easter, Health, life, love, music, pray, prayer, religion
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I’m alive and well
Your spirit is within me
Because you died and rose again

I am alive, but I don’t always feel well. However in a spiritual sense all is well.

That hasn’t always been the case though I’m afraid, as I have been through some very dark times, when I did question God, and felt He had deserted me. However having got through those times, I know that the only reason I made it through those days was because God was with me and He was the one responsible for helping me through those days.

God lives in me, and I pray that as I live each day, others may realise these is something different about me, and that they can see Christ in me.

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