Posts Tagged ‘Health’

The Right People

Posted: May 18, 2013 in friendship, life, love, music, religion, words
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Being sad with the right people is better than being happy with the wrong ones ~ Philippos

So true.

If you’re sad or upset, you need people around you who will support you and care for you. Sadly however I’m sure we’ve all found ourselves with people who don’t seem to care about us when we’re most in need of support. But have you realised these are not the people you should be calling “true friends”?

Therefore make sure those you call true friends are people you know and trust will be there for you in your times of need, because if they’re not, don’t leave it until you need a friend most, to find out they don’t really care for you.

True friends will be there for you during your lowest times as well as during your happiest moments, I hope you’ve found some true friends!

Managing Grief #7

Posted: May 16, 2013 in bereavement, death, family, friendship, Health, life, love, pets
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It may be a cat, a bird, a ferret, or a guinea pig, but the chances are high that when someone close to you dies, a pet will be there to pick up the slack. Pets devour the loneliness. They give us purpose, responsibility, a reason for getting up in the morning, and a reason to look to the future. They ground us, help us escape the grief, make us laugh, and take full advantage of our weakness by exploiting our furniture, our beds, and our refrigerator. We wouldn’t have it any other way. Pets are our seat belts on the emotional roller coaster of life–they can be trusted, they keep us safe, and they sure do smooth out the ride.

by Nick Trout, Tell Me Where It Hurts: A Day of Humor, Healing and Hope in My Life as an Animal Surgeon

Grief can be even tougher to cope with if you are on your own. However, as Nick Trout says above, even the company of a pet, can be the comfort and companionship you need to help you through the difficult days after a bereavement.

So if you have a pet, I hope you realise they can be your companion during these days, but if you haven’t, why not consider getting a pet to keep you company. After all, not only will you enjoy their companionship, I’m sure they will enjoy you company just as much, if not more.

Managing Grief #6

Posted: May 9, 2013 in bereavement, blogging, death, dementia, family, friendship, holiday, life, love
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It’s been a few weeks since I posted anything in my “Managing Grief” series, but it’s not because there was nothing more to suggest, simply I couldn’t write the words down. As many of you will know, there have been two bereavements in my own family in the last couple of months (my Dad and my aunt), and I think it’s only been in the last few weeks that I’ve begun to truly grieve for them.

Anyway, onto today’s thoughts on how to manage your grief…

Be realistic in your expectations.

In Finding Your Way After Your Spouse Dies by Marta Felber, Marta writes the following:

My loved one died on January 25. Almost immediately, I began to dread the next Christmas without him, exactly 11 months away!

The way in which she coped with her anxiety about the coming Christmas was to plan carefully and keep her expectations realistic:

“Try to have reasonable expectations. There are important ways in which celebrations will not, and cannot, ever be the same again. So it is okay to plan for them to be different. Be realistic about what you can handle, both physically and emotionally. Be kind to yourself and nurturing.”

Elderly woman sitting in an armchairI can truly relate to those sentiments, as my Dad died on 21st February this year, and just a couple of weeks ago, on the 25th April, we had to cope with my Dad’s first birthday since he passed away. It was awful knowing that for the first time in my life we didn’t have to wonder what to buy Dad for his birthday, but, more importantly, we wouldn’t even be celebrating the day with Dad anymore. The 25th April was a working day for me, and I can truthful tell you that I don’t know how I got through that day at work in one piece as my heart was most definitely with Dad.
I can only imagine how hard it was for Mum. However to make sure Mum wasn’t on her own all day, feeling sorry for herself and getting upset as Dad was no longer here, we took her out at night for a meal…not to celebrate Dad’s birthday but just to remember Dad on what would have been his special day. It turned out though that Mum had actually been out most of the day, as in the afternoon, she apparently went down to the nursing home Dad had been in (and died in), and spent time there with the nurses who had cared for, and looked after Dad so well during his time there.
We got through the first of our significant days since our two bereavements by setting realistic expectations, so I know it will work, so please try this for yourself.

Feelings of the Heart

Posted: April 30, 2013 in celebrity, friendship, heart, life, love, nature
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The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart ~ Helen Keller

How beautiful and true is that!

When something touches your heart, it can be difficult to describe, however it is always beautiful to experience.

So open your heart today, and let the beautiful things of life truly touch your heart. I can recommend it, it is great therapy particularly when you’re going through some tough times.

open-your-heart

Care You Not

Posted: April 17, 2013 in cross, death, Easter, friendship, life, love, music, religion
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Care You Not By William J Shannon
 
In the paths along the way,
Countless souls are passing by,
Many lost and some are saved.
Shall we stand idly by?
 
So you not care for those in pain,
Those we love, in sin do die.
When by a word, or some kind deed,
Will cheer some soul in need.
 
Blessed Saviour, be our Guide,
To have us bring the light
To souls that are lost,
Down to the foot of the cross.

Do you care about those in pain?

Do you care about those in need?

Do you care about those who haven’t found Christ?

All those of us who answered “Yes” to these questions, will be doing their best to help those of you who said “No”, to accept Christ as their saviour.

Let’s knee down before Christ, at the foot of the cross, and thank Him for giving His life for us, and in turn accepting Him into our lives.

Life’s Too Short…

Posted: April 13, 2013 in death, family, finance, friendship, language, love, Shopping
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  • To hold a grudgeclock
  • To be normal
  • To never forgive
  • To act your age all the time!
  • To work long hours and never spend quality time with your family
  • To worry about things you can’t change
  • To never follow your dreams
  • To care about what others think of us
  • To be anything but happy
  • To save every pence we earn and never treat ourselves

We are all on this earth for a limited time, therefore, live each day as if it were your last, as you never know just how many more days you have left to tell those you love just what they mean to you, or do the things you’ve always wanted to do.

Alive and Well

Posted: April 2, 2013 in blogging, cross, death, Easter, Health, life, love, music, pray, prayer, religion
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I’m alive and well
Your spirit is within me
Because you died and rose again

I am alive, but I don’t always feel well. However in a spiritual sense all is well.

That hasn’t always been the case though I’m afraid, as I have been through some very dark times, when I did question God, and felt He had deserted me. However having got through those times, I know that the only reason I made it through those days was because God was with me and He was the one responsible for helping me through those days.

God lives in me, and I pray that as I live each day, others may realise these is something different about me, and that they can see Christ in me.

Endless

Posted: March 21, 2013 in bereavement, children, death, dementia, depression, family, friendship, Health, heart, heaven, hospital, life, love, music, religion, words
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tearsThere are some things which can seem endless. Some that are good and some not so good. Things like the love and support from family and friends can feel endless which is obviously good. While a continual string of bad or events which affect your life are the complete opposite.

I’ve felt for the last few years that my life has just been one constant struggle after another between my own health problems as well as health  problems and other issues affecting other members of my family. This has all culminated in the last few weeks with my Dad passing away and now my 90-year-old aunt being admitted to hospital a couple of weeks ago with a bad chest infection and not eating or drinking, and then just a few days ago being told my aunt had probably had a stroke and it was unlikely she’d pull through.

How does that make me feel? Well at times I question God, as I’m sure we all do sometimes, “why me?”, but other times I acknowledge that God wouldn’t let me go through these experiences if he didn’t think I could handle them.

That doesn’t make me feel any better during these tough days, and it of course doesn’t make my life any easier, but it does remind me that God lives me and walks beside me in all situations, even though it may feel to me that he’s deserted me.

So when you are going through what seems like an endless string of bad things, remember God is there and is supporting you in all at all times.

The following video of Susan Best singing God is Always There will hopefully help you remember that God is always there for you:

Managing Grief #5

Posted: March 15, 2013 in family, love, life, religion, Health, friendship, blogging, depression, words, death, bereavement
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memoriesAs you’ll know if you’re a regular reader of my blog, I’ve been writing a number of posts giving some thoughts on how to cope with the death of a loved one.

Today I want to focus on boundaries…your boundaries!

Protect your boundaries – You are the only one who truly knows and understands how you feel and how you are coping with your grief.

Some will avoid speaking to you as they will find it difficult to know what to say to you, others will offer words of comfort and extend their sympathies to you. Some will extend invitations to you, or ask you to take on tasks – Don’t pressurize yourself into saying, “Yes“. Instead, give yourself permission to say, “No thank you” or “I’ll pass on it for now”. Remember it’s about you, and how you are feeling, it’s not about any one else.

Another way of protecting your personal boundaries is to accept an invitation from someone, but put some limits on it. e.g. Tell them, “Yes, I will be happy to join you, but please know that I may have to excuse myself a little earlier than others”.

Finally, remember when you’ve suffered a bereavement it’s ok to protect your personal boundaries. However if you accept an invitation that’s been offered to you, don’t fret about it, because the anticipation of the occasions is always much worse than it actual turns out to be. Rest assured that, with God‘s grace, the occasion will not be nearly as difficult as you think it will.

“The Lord is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit” ~ Psalm 34:18

Managing Grief #4

Posted: March 11, 2013 in bereavement, blogging, death, family, friendship, Health, holiday, life, love
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As I’ve mentioned in my previous Managing Grief blog posts I’m doing a series on how to manage grief following the loss of a loved one.

So what do I want to focus on today…holiday times!

Holiday times can be physically draining at the best of times, never mind when it’s the first holiday time you’ve experienced since your loved one died. it may also be a lonely time for you as you may not have other friends and family around you to support you through this time.

In Managing Grief #2 I said it was important to remember your loved one, and this is no more relevant than during holiday times. So make sure you take time during these period not just to try to come to term with the fact that your loved one is no longer with you during these holidays, but also to remember and even laugh at memories of past holiday occasions.

They always say “laugher is good for the soul”, well I would add that “laughter is good for grief”. i.e. Remember the good times with your loved one, remember the funny stories/events that have taken place during holiday occasions and smile and laugh at them once again.

So don’t be lonely during the holiday times, whether that means you’ve got friends and family around you or whether that means you’re by yourself remember past holidays with your loved one…whatever you find yourself doing, enjoy the memories, laugh at the funny memories because they will do you the world of good.

funny-random-happy-memories

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