…2013 seems to be bringing more of the same for me so far. 
Firstly, I thought as it was the start of a new year, a time for new beginnings, I would once again make the first move to try to reconcile with 
several people who were once very close friends and confidants, but sadly for various reasons those relationships have broken down to such an extent in the last few years that not only to these folk ignore me and sometimes my husband too, but are often downright rude and cruel towards us – I certainly did not think any broken relationship merited such awful treatment, especially from people who would openly tell you they are Christians!
To be honest, I wish I hadn’t bothered again (I’ve reached out several times before to these folk), because the various people concerned either completely ignored me again, or responded in an obnoxious manner questioning why I thought I “had the right to expect them to speak to me” – At no time did I ever tell anyone I expected them to speak to me, so I was deeply hurt again.
So much for new beginnings and putting the past behind us and moving on!
I do wonder what kind of Christian does that make these folk? I’m definitely not saying I’m perfect, far from it, but I’ve felt right from the time these folk started to ignore us that things were taken out of context and exaggerated out of all proportion, and surely as Christians we should be able to rise above these disagreements, put them aside, forgive and move on…sadly not all seem to agree with me.
Secondly, health concerns for my hubby started again on New Year‘s Day again as we had to postpone our new year’s day dinner with my Mum as hubby wasn’t well enough to leave the house.
Thirdly, my own health problems seem to have peaked again since last Wednesday/Thursday although I think some of this may be down to all the other issues that have arisen since the start of the year!
Lastly, my Dad’s health has deteriorated considerably in the last week and a half as although he was previously sitting with his eyes closed all the time, he was at least responding to us when we spoke to him and was opening his eyes. However it got to the stage where he was no longer opening his eyes at all or speaking to us at all and he was also refusing to eat, drink or take any of his medication. So much so that last Friday he was admitted to hospital because he was badly dehydrated – That was a long day in itself, as the GP saw him about 3.45pm and decided he should go to hospital, although we later discovered he hadn’t bothered to order the ambulance until 5.30pm!
Meanwhile Mum and me waited at the nursing home with Dad for the ambulance as Mum was keen to ensure Dad got settled ok at hospital. What a long wait that ended up being…the ambulance didn’t turn up at the nursing home until almost 11pm. It was then about 12.20am before the doctor first spoke to us at the hospital and then about 2.40am before Dad finally got settled into a ward. By the time I dropped Mum back home and got myself home it was about 3.30am!
It turned out Dad has a chest infection and id apparently can often cause added confusion for dementia sufferers and cause then to be more sleepy and less willing to eat/drink than normal. Dad’s now being treated in hospital for his chest infection and he is beginning to become a little it more responsive when we speak to him (not that much of what he says makes any sense), so hopefully he’ll get back to being able (and willing) to eat and drink by himself again soon.
So we’re only 8 days into 2013, but already I’d say I’m really not liking this year so far. So one thing is for certain, 2013 can really only get better, can’t it?!
I’ve done reasonably ok with this one when I’ve been working, but also done not too badly the rest of the time too!
Get back to playing the piano regularly as it’s been a while
Ten weeks ago today I was at work when I got a phone call from my Mum to tell me Dad was being taken into 
Even although it’s my Dad we’re visiting, I’m sorry to say I find it quite a chore. Don’t think it’s because I don;t love my Dad because I do, but as far as I’m concerned my Dad “died” a few years ago when his dementia meant he didn’t know me any more and he could no longer have a sensible conversation with us. Much of the time when we visit Dad he just sleeps, or sit/lies with his eyes shut unwilling to talk or look at us. Mum is still making comments to Dad as if he’s going to get better and as if he can logically understand where he is and why. It’s sad but also frustrating.
Eat 
As you’ll know if you read my blog post yesterday (
As far as how I cope with the situation with Dad, I think my automatic coping mechanism of seeing the funny side of everything definitely kicks in. Dad’s dementia means he has often said and done things which are quite funny on one hand, but when I think about the person he used to be, are incredibly sad and heartbreaking. Whenever anyone asks about Dad I find myself almost smiling and joking about it all the time, simply because it’s how I keep myself together and don’t fall apart. So if you’ve spoken to me and thought I seemed to make light of Dad’s situation please realise it’s just the way I cope with it, as I am deeply upset and saddened by what has happened to him, and I certainly do not find it funny in any way.
This last week my Dad would not eat or drink anything more than just a couple of mouthfuls of food or liquid, so on Wednesday Mum called in our 
When we went into the ward to see Dad, he was lying on his bed slouched down with his head off his pillow, sleeping…he looked small and frail…and I think that was when it all hit Mum…she got quiet upset seeing Dad like that. Although he was actually a bit better last night than he’d been since he went into hospital as he actually answered us a few times when we spoke to him…not necessarily with comprehensible answers, but at least he answered us! Dad might have spoken to us tonight, but he didn’t know who Mum or I were, and no matter how long that has happened for I still find that sad and upsetting…though I can’t imagine how Mum must feel having been married to him for over 55 years!
Having been off work sick since the start of this year, I’ve been seeing my 
I’d a follow-up appointment at the hospital where I’d had a number of tests to try to establish the cause of my ongoing 
Earlier this year I was devastated when Mum told me that Dad that told her he didn’t think he had long to live. And to be honest this has haunted me ever since even though until yesterday, I don’t think Dad had said this for a few months. However just to finish of the year on a low note, Dad said this to Mum again yesterday.
As some of you will be aware, I have an aunt who’s been in hospital for eight weeks, during which time I’ve been visiting her every day or every second day with my Mum. Today my aunt was being discharged from hospital into respite care for a few weeks.
