Posts Tagged ‘anger’

We can all be guilty of jumping straight in with words, decisions, actions, without thinking about the consequences (regardless of whether positive or negative). That is why when I came across this picture it really struck home with me.

pause

At the end of the day everything comes back to prayer doesn’t it!

 

When someone who is angry or upset about something, confronts you, how do you react?

 

Anger-Management

 

Personally, when I was younger I probably would have responded to anger with anger, but I’d say these days, I am less likely to do that, although I’m not saying it never happens! I am definitely more likely to try and speak calmly and reason with the angry person now. Although I know if I feel the person in questions is really not listening to me, I’m likely to get frustrated, and with frustration comes annoyance and anger.

In Proverbs 15:1 it says:

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger

And it’s true isn’t it, if you confront an angry person with anger, both of you get more and more angry. However sometimes speaking calming to an angry person can calm their anger and quell the storm. So taking a calm approach to anger is the best way to try and bring confrontations to a peaceful and satisfactory conclusion for all – Is this how you react when confronted with anger?

I’ve been reminded in the last week how petty people can be at times, complaining about things such as

  • where we’ve been asked to sit
  • how much space we have

Yes, it’s good to be comfortable and be happy in the company of those around us, but surely there are far more important things in life to focus our energies on. What can make petty disagreements even worse is when they involve Christians, as they really should know better!

I’m sure many of us can think of examples, such as those I’ve mentioned above which have caused disagreements and in some instances caused things to be said or done which have hurt or upset other Christians. The devil is definitely at work in these situations, because if we’re arguing or disagreeing with one another we’re not fighting evil!

Let’s remember that we should be working together for God, and that means supporting and encouraging one another, even during times when maybe we don’t always agree. As Christians we can disagree with each other, but it’s how we air those disagreements that determines whether the devil is stirring things up or whether we’re dealing with things in a way that God would expect and want Christians to do so.

So don’t let the devil dictate how we deal with situations we are not happy with, let God guide you and give you the words to deal with things in His way.Ephesians 4 26-27

So following on from my blog post a few days ago Hard Hearted, where I spoke about how we must not let negativity take us over, I want to remind you that how we feel inside is reflected in our actions. I.e. if we’re feeling angry inside our actions reflect our anger. Likewise if we’re happy inside and feel loved, we will show love to those we meet.

Therefore no matter what’s going on in your life, give it to God and leave it with Him so that you may feel inward peace and love, and thus your actions will be those of a loving person.

How we think shows through in how we act. Attitudes are mirrors of the mind. They reflect thinking ~ David Joseph Schwartz

If you’re anything like me you’ll have been in a situation many times when someone has said something,k and you’ve instantly responded without taking a minute to consider what you were going to say…and then after saying it, instantly regretting what you did say!

Maybe that’s why when I read the following quote the other week, I could really relate to it:

It often shows an excellent command of language to say nothing. — Unknown

I think the main reason I could relate to this statement is because I know for me, it’s something I should do more frequently! I need to think through what I’m about to say before I say it, to make sure I’m not going to annoy, upset or cause offence to the person I’m intending saying it to, and then stop myself from saying anything if my words would be inappropriate.

I have prayed many times that God will help me to say the right things in the right situations, and stop me from saying things I shouldn’t say. I am aware of some occasions when I have stopped myself from saying something I shouldn’t, but still too often I am still doing it.

So take a few moments before you speak, to consider whether what you’re about to say will be helpful or hurtful, and if it will be the latter, don’t say it!

I’m sure many of you are like me and hang onto possessions, memories and emotions which you really should have thrown out long ago.

Sometimes we hold onto people and/or emotions which are negative or detrimental to our Christian growth, but that doesn’t seem to bother us. Why?

Is it because we think we know better than God about what’s good for us?

Today please take a few minutes to review the belongs, emotions and people that are in your life, and identify those which you really shouldn’t hang onto any more. After all I’m sure we can all think of people in our lives who, for want of a better way of putting it, bring out the worst in us! I’m sure we all let our mind wander to events/memories which maybe caused us pain or anger at the time, and when we think about them even now, they still cause us pain or anger.

These are all things we need to let go of by giving them to God, and leaving them there.

I know that can be very tough, but take it from someone who has let past hurts and angers continue to affect me years after they occurred, keeping hold of them is poisonous both to our life and our faith. I finally realised this after many years of pain and anger over one situation, that I really had to “let it go” and give it all to God. I can honestly say, that having done that it made a huge difference to me, as although I still think about the situation sometimes, I now look at the positives that came from that situation, rather than focusing on the pain and anger I felt in the immediate aftermath.

So in conclusion, let go and let God!

Forgiveness doesn’t make the other person right; it makes you free. ~ Omartian

As a Christian, forgiveness is something I always hope I am willing to give others, and that they of course, are willing to give to me!

Jesus died just so that we could be forgiven of all our sins. He died for love, He died so that we could be free.

Proverbs 17:9 (NLT)

Love prospers when a fault is forgiven, but dwelling on it separates close friends.

Be forgiving and don’t get caught up in things that have hurt you in the past. Move on, love those who have wronged you and let them know you have forgiven them and you will find your friendship rewarding and everlasting.

Do you know anyone who flies off the handle at the least little problem?

Isn’t it funny how some people seem to totally over react to the slightest comment or event, while others go on as it absolutely nothing could ever get them annoyed or worked up.

Is it all in the way we handle ourselves inwardly when things annoy us? I.e. Some might be really fuming inside but keep those emotions firmly within them while others let their emotions almost erupt out of them.

When the “red mist” descends on you, how to react? Calm and collected on the outside but mad on the inside, or mad on both the inside and outside?

Personally I know I used to suffer somewhat from the “red mist” syndrome, because when I got annoyed/angry, everyone knew it! Now I’d like to think that in most occasions although I may be mad on the inside, outwardly I try to stay calm and collected. N.B. I said “try” to stay calm and collected, I don’t always succeed!

When people “lose it”, have you noticed how all sense of reality and proportion seems to go from all these do and say. Is it any wonder that we often find those who fly off the handle at the least little thing, don’t have the respect of those around them!

Ultimately do those who lose it, achieve any more in these situations than those who stay calm? I don’t think so – those who stay calm probably get frustrated and fed up at the rant that my greet them, but that’s all. Whereas those who “lose it” are probably doing more damage to themselves on a health basis than they realise, as I can’t imagine getting worked up and angry/annoyed about things constantly does their health much good, particularly their blood pressure.

Personally I think it’s far better to try and keep your temper and calmly and sensibly debate/discuss the problem or issue, as this way everyone is more open and willing to hear each other’s viewpoint, and thus a civil conclusion is far more likely to be reached…one that all involved are happy with.