When I was younger, I used to dream about having children. I never really had any great thoughts on how many kids I wanted or whether I’d prefer boys or girls. Now however, I dream of what life might have been like if we’d ever had children…
When you meet new new people or get into conversation with someone you’ve never really spoken to before, what are some of the first few things you ask them about themselves?
My guess is, if they’re married or you know they have a partner, you’ll ask them if they have any kids, or how many kids they have, would I be right?
It’s funny how when you’re married or have a partner, it’s almost expected by most people that you’ll have kids. Sometimes when I’ve been asked if we have kids and I’ve answered no, I seen looks of shock and confusing and it’s almost as if people are trying to compute why having been married for a number of years we’ve not had any children.
Yes, maybe most couples do have children and it isn’t the “norm” not to have children, but have you ever considered that maybe it’s not through choice that some couples are childless? Unfortunately for many, for a variety of reasons it’s not been possible for them to have children. e.g. infertility of male and/or female, concerns over health of childbearer.
I still find it difficult to come to terms with the fact that we’re not going to have kids, and often struggle when asked about whether we have kids or not. I sometimes wonder if I am in fact jealous of those who have kids, and often pray that God will continue to help me totally accept my situation and not feel any jealousy towards others just because they are fortunate to have children.
God decides what happens and doesn’t happens in our lives. He has decided that children are not part of His plan for us. I know He has very good reasons for this and know He has other things in life planned for me.
So in answer to the question, “How many kids do we have”, my answer is “none”, but please please please don’t look all shocked and surprised by my response.
The Distinct Dot 