Posts Tagged ‘bereavement’

I came across the following quote a few days ago, and it’s really struck a chord with me:

The darker the night, the brighter the stars,

The deeper the grief, the closer is God!”

by Fyodor Dostoyevsky

Grief can tear us apart inside and make us feel overwhelmed by life and everything that lies ahead. However it’s in these darkest times that God really does draw very close to us, to ease our fears and reassure us that we can face the future without those who have passed away.

So regardless of what has made your day feel the darkest day ever, be assured that God is close to you now and forever.

It’s funny isn’t it, how quickly things can change – one minute things are going well, then the next you hit an all time low…it’s rotten isn’t it?

Well in the last few days I’ve felt just like that, as this last weekend I was away with Bellshill Salvation Army Band at Guisborough where we lead the praise and worship meetings at the Salvation Army there on Saturday night and then Sunday morning and afternoon. What a fantastic weekend that was with the band playing brilliantly; the spiritual challenges given by both the music and those who lead the various devotional periods both before the meetings and during them.

Life-Mental-HealthBy the end of the weekend though on Sunday night, things were beginning to turn for me as, as I had expected my pain levels were starting to go through the roof with my pain killers not making any difference to my pain at all, plus extreme fatigue was taking over again.

Then today, Monday, it was a struggle to get out of bed as between pain and extreme fatigue it took a great effort. Thankfully I had planned today would be a day of nothingness as I anticipated I would be feeling like this after a long busy couple of days. If only it had continued as a day of nothingness…

First of all, just after lunchtime, my husband got a phone call from one the guys from work that he’s good friends with, to tell us that one of the other guys at work that they are friends with had been found dead in his home this morning. We were both shocked and stunned by this news as it had come completely out of the blue…

Not long after we’d received that first bit of bad news, we received a second bit of bad news…my Aunt Mabel, my Dad’s sister had died yesterday. She, like my Dad had dementia and, just like Dad had, had a fall, and had never really recovered from it.

What a rotten year this has been, that’s now 3 of my close family members, my Dad, then Aunt Mae, and now Aunt Mabel died, plus one of my husband’s cousin’s also died at the start of the year. How quickly the great highs of a fabulous challenging weekend and be put to one side when death strikes.

If you are a praying person, can I make two request of you please: firstly that you pray for the family and friends of my work colleague who has passed away suddenly; and secondly, can you pray for my family as this is our third family bereavement this year, and my Mum in particular is taking this hard.

Thank you.

We can cry with hope
We can say goodbye with hope
‘Cause we know our goodbye is not the end.


Revelation 21:4 (Amplified Bible)

God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and death shall be no more, neither shall there be anguish (sorrow and mourning) nor grief nor pain any more, for the old conditions and the former order of things have passed away.

Another sad day, but another day full of hope, as we said our final farewells to another loved one.

I came across the above song on YouTube yesterday and it really touch me, and reaffirmed to me that death of a loved one, is not the end of our relationship, because we will meet again in heaven.

There’s only one thing in life that’s certain, and that is that we’ll all die at some point. Even so, it’s still difficult for us to cope with death when someone close to us dies.

I pray that when we suffer bereavement, we may find reassurance and peace knowing there is hope…hope, in the knowledge that our goodbye is not the end.

Yesterday in Invisible Pain I spoke about how many people suffer silently from physical pain, every day. Today I want to consider those suffering other pain, emotional pain.

How many times have you heard someone say:

Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting  some kind of battle.

Many times I’ve been felt totally drained emotionally because of all of life’s situations I’ve having to cope with, but when I’m with others I always do my best to hide how I’m really feeling, because the thought of others truly knowing how I feel would mean I’d fall apart publicly and that is one of my worst nightmares!

There are many things that we all try to “hide” from others: our grief over the death of a loved one, health concerns for ourselves or a loved one, depression, financial worries, job security, concern about our children etc

All these are things which often others will know nothing about. i.e. there are no physical signs, however that most certainly doesn’t mean these concerns/issues are any less painful to those experiencing them.

Just as the quote I listed above says, just because someone looks ok from the outside, does not mean they are ok on the inside. Some of us have many battles that we face on a daily basis, but they are ones which those around us know nothing about. So do just as the above quote says:

Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting  some kind of battle.

In the last couple of days the news headlines have been dominated by the deaths of two celebrities. First of all yesterday it was the Charlie’s Angels star Farrah Fawcett and then of course last last night the news that music legend Michael Jackson had died, started to come through on the news and has subsequently dominated tv and radio stations for much of today.

Before I go any further I want to say at that I do not intend to say anymore about either of these celebrities in this blog, as there are there are countless other sites that contain information about these people lives, so if you’re looking for information about them, this is not the site you want.

So onto what I do want to talk about…

Throughout the world this week, there are many people who have suffered bereavements. In fact, I personally know of a number of people who have been bereaved in this last week.

Death is one of life’s certainties – we all know we will die at some time, some sooner that others. Even so, although we know death will come to us all, it does not make it any easier for family and friends to cope when their relative or friend passes away.

Many tears are often shed when someone dies. Tears of sadness that they will never see their loved one again, and sometimes even tears of happiness when they reminisce about past times spent with their loved one.

John 3:16
For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth on him should not perish, but have eternal life

Well known words, but words which mean the world to Christians worldwide – if we believe in God, we can live forever simply because God loves us, every single one of us, so much that he let his son die on a cross at Calvary. Wow! How amazing and wonderful is that!?

Death is not the end, it is simply the beginning of eternal life with God. For that we must rejoice. When our friends/love ones pass away, try to remember that they are at peace, their struggles on earth are at at end and they are now at rest with our heavenly Father.

Here is Michael W Smith‘s great song called Live Forever. Hope you enjoy it!

Please pray today for those who have suffered bereavements in this last week. I’d ask you to pray particularly for their family and friends – that they may understand and accept that their loved one/friend is now at peace, and is peace in God’s presence.

Finally I’d like to leave some other well known words of scripture with you – but maybe a slightly different version from you’re used to hearing

Psalm 23 (Contemporary English Version)
You, LORD, are my shepherd.
I will never be in need.
You let me rest in fields of green grass.
You lead me to streams of peaceful water, and you refresh my life.
You are true to your name, and you lead me along the right paths.
I may walk through valleys as dark as death, but I won’t be afraid.
You are with me, and your shepherd’s rod [a] makes me feel safe.
You treat me to a feast, while my enemies watch.
You honor me as your guest, and you fill my cup until it overflows.
Your kindness and love will always be with me each day of my life, and I will live forever in your house, LORD