Posts Tagged ‘Nursing home’

So tomorrow is February, and as the title of this blog post suggests, it’s a month I wish I could just miss out completely. To be honest it’s been a month that I haven’t looked forward to for a number of years now, but after last year, it’s now a month I just want to completely forget about.

Why does February make me feel like this?

Sad-memory21 years ago this February, my husband’s sister died – We weren’t married at the time. February would also have been her birthday, and this year  she would have been 50.

11 years ago this February my mother in law suffered her 2nd stroke and spent much of February that year in hospital before passing away on the 2nd March. February would also have been her birthday, and this year she would have been 80.

Last year my Dad was admitted to hospital on 4th January and on 1st February we were told there was nothing more they could do for Dad. On the 4th February Dad was transferred from hospital back to his nursing home on end of life care. He died several weeks later on 21st February and his funeral was on 27th February.

As you can see February holds lots of sad memories for me, and this year will be particularly difficult as it is the first anniversary of my Dad’s death. So if it’s possible, can I just miss out February this year please?

 

Well thank goodness that’s us just about at the end of 2013, because for me, although it seems to have been a very quick year, it’s been a really rotten year!

Dad at our weddingI’m getting a feeling of deja vu here, as I seem to recall saying at the end of 2012 it had been a tough year for me…if I’d know what lay ahead in 2013, 2012 would have seemed like a walk in the park!

So we’re almost at the end of 2012. I don’t know about you, but this year seems to be over nearly as soon as it began! I know some will tell me that’s a sign of getting old, but I refuse to believe that, as I think it’s simply been because there’s been so much going on in my life this year…again.

I should have known when 2013 it was going to be a tough year as right from the start of the year it was apparent that Dad’s dementia was deteriorating, as from just before the close of 2012, Dad would not eat or drink anything, and thus was hospitalised on 4th January for the 2nd time in a few months.

Sadly this time he did not recover, and at the start of February Dad was discharged from hospital to his nursing home on end of life care. I think it was only when the nurses at the nursing home said “end of life care” that Mum finally realised what the hospital had been saying for the last couple of weeks. On the 21st of February, my Dad lost his life to vascular dementia.

Aunt Mae (Aug 2011)In January my Aunt Mae (Mum’s sister) was moved from her care home to the nursing home my Dad was in, as her dementia was causing her to become violent towards the staff at her care home and they could no longer cope with her there.

The week after Dad’s funeral, we got summoned to my Aunt Mae’s care home as they were waiting on an ambulance for her as she had a bad chest infection. It turned out they thought she’s had a mild stroke, but when they went to do the CT scan to confirm this, she had another stroke. Sadly on 3rd April my Aunt Mae passed away, due to a combination of her stroke and her dementia.

I’m not quite sure how I got through those months as being the guardian for both my Dad and Aunt Mae, I had to do all the organisation (with help from Mum and Sandy), clear out both Dad’s and Aunt Mae’s belongings from the nursing home, stay strong form Mum who, as you can imagine, was devastated. To be honest I don’t think it really all hit me until about May and then I really struggled to come to terms with the death of 2 of the people I’ve been closest to.

Unfortunately this was not the end of the bereavements for my family, as in mid November my Dad’s sister died, also from dementia, which knocked my Mum for six again, as we were always quite close with my Auntie Mabel and her family as when I was young, we used to spend just about the whole of our summer holiday’s in Cambridge with her and her family.

Sandy’s side of my family also suffered a couple of bereavements this year, so all in all we’ve had far more than our fair share of family bereavements this year. Add to these bereavements, my hubby’s health issues and my own on-going health issues, and you can see it’s not been a great year for us.

I’m still finding life quite tough just now, as I continue to miss my Dad in particular, but there’s one song that has been stuck in my head for a few months now which keeps reminding me that no matter what I’m facing, and how bad life seems, God is there for me and He will always be there for me – Here’s Kutless with Promise of a Lifetime:

So as you can see 2013 has been a rotten year so I’ll be glad to see the back of it! 2014 can only be a better year can’t it!

I hope your 2013 has been a far happier year than mine has been, however if not, I hope you have had the love and support of family and friends to help you through the year.

I pray that as we look ahead to 2014 you may go forward with confidence knowing that whatever situations you have to deal with, God is by your side not just during this Christmas season, but all year-long.

The Promise of a Lifetime by Kutless
 
I have fallen to my knees
As I sing a lullaby of pain
I’m feeling broken in my melody
As I sing to help the tears go away Then I remember the pledge you made to me 

I know you’re always there
To hear my every prayer inside
I’m clinging to the promise of a lifetime
I hear the words you say
To never walk away from me and leave behind
The promise of a lifetime

Will you help me fall apart
Pick me up, take me in your arms
Find my way back from the storm
And you show me how to grow
Through the change

I still remember the pledge you made to me

I know you’re always there
To hear my every prayer inside
I’m clinging to the promise of a lifetime
I hear the words you say
To never walk away from me and leave behind
The promise of a lifetime  I am holding on to the hope I have inside
With you I will stay through every day
Putting my understanding aside

I am comforted
To know your always there
To hear my every prayer inside
I’m clinging to the promise of a lifetime.
I hear the words you say
To never walk away from me and leave behind
The promise of a lifetime

I know you’re always there
To hear my every prayer inside
I’m clinging to the promise of a lifetime
Looking back at me
I know that you can see
My heart is open to the promise of a lifetime 

…2013 seems to be bringing more of the same for me so far. 😦

Firstly, I thought as it was the start of a new year, a time for new beginnings, I would once again make the first move to try to reconcile with brokenfriendshipseveral people who were once very close friends and confidants, but sadly for various reasons those relationships have broken down to such an extent in the last few years that not only to these folk ignore me and sometimes my husband too, but are often downright rude and cruel towards us – I certainly did not think any broken relationship merited such awful treatment, especially from people who would openly tell you they are Christians!

To be honest, I wish I hadn’t bothered again (I’ve reached out several times before to these folk), because the various people concerned either completely ignored me again, or responded in an obnoxious manner questioning why I thought I “had the right to expect them to speak to me” – At no time did I ever tell anyone I expected them to speak to me, so I was deeply hurt again.

So much for new beginnings and putting the past behind us and moving on!

I do wonder what kind of Christian does that make these folk? I’m definitely not saying I’m perfect, far from it, but I’ve felt right from the time these folk started to ignore us that things were taken out of context and exaggerated out of all proportion, and surely as Christians we should be able to rise above these disagreements, put them aside, forgive and move on…sadly not all seem to agree with me.

Secondly, health concerns for my hubby started again on New Year‘s Day again as we had to postpone our new year’s day dinner with my Mum as hubby wasn’t well enough to leave the house.

Thirdly, my own health problems seem to have peaked again since last Wednesday/Thursday although I think some of this may be down to all the other issues that have arisen since the start of the year!

hospital2Lastly, my Dad’s health has deteriorated considerably in the last week and a half as although he was previously sitting with his eyes closed all the time, he was at least responding to us when we spoke to him and was opening his eyes. However it got to the stage where he was no longer opening his eyes at all or speaking to us at all and he was also refusing to eat, drink or take any of his medication. So much so that last Friday he was admitted to hospital because he was badly dehydrated – That was a long day in itself, as the GP saw him about 3.45pm and decided he should go to hospital, although we later discovered he hadn’t bothered to order the ambulance until 5.30pm!

Meanwhile Mum and me waited at the nursing home with Dad for the ambulance as Mum was keen to ensure Dad got settled ok at hospital. What a long wait that ended up being…the ambulance didn’t turn up at the nursing home until almost 11pm. It was then about 12.20am before the doctor first spoke to us at the hospital and then about 2.40am before Dad finally got settled into a ward. By the time I dropped Mum back home and got myself home it was about 3.30am!

It turned out Dad has a chest infection and id apparently can often cause added confusion for dementia sufferers and cause then to be more sleepy and less willing to eat/drink than normal. Dad’s now being treated in hospital for his chest infection and he is beginning to become a little it more responsive when we speak to him  (not that much of what he says makes any sense), so hopefully he’ll get back to being able (and willing) to eat and drink by himself again soon.

So we’re only 8 days into 2013, but already I’d say I’m really not liking this year so far. So one thing is for certain, 2013 can really only get better, can’t it?!

So we’re almost at the end of 2012. I don’t know about you, but this year seems to be over nearly as soon as it began! I know some will tell me that’s a sign of getting old, but I refuse to believe that, as I think it’s simply been because there’s been so much going on in my life this year…again.

emergency-signIt’s been another tough year for me:

  • Supporting my hubby as his health has deteriorated
  • Supporting my Mum for the first half of the year while she struggled to continue to look after and care for my Dad at home as his dementia worsened
  • Supporting Mum in the second half of the year as Dad first of all was in hospital for over 10 weeks and then moved into a local nursing home
  • Visiting my aunt who has been living in a care home for over 2 years and who reached the grand age of 90 in October
  • Various trips to A&E with my hubby , my Dad and my aunt – and of course they were all long waits, and sometimes during the night
  • Hubby’s retirement – which looking back on things was the best thing he could have done given how his health has deteriorated since he finished working
  • Several family bereavements
  • On-going health issues of my own

In amongst all that I’ve managed to keep working full-time, and unbelievably haven’t been off sick all year! Not quite sure how I managed that as there were some days when my pain levels were so severe I really don’t know how I managed to get through the day at work, but obviously I managed it somehow!

Anyway, enough about my year. I hope that whatever this year has brought you, good or bad, you will have made the most of your time with your friends and family as we never know what tomorrow will bring. I pray that you may have felt God‘s blessings on you during this year, and as we look ahead to 2013 you may go forward with confidence that whatever situations you have to deal with, God is by your side not just during this Christmas season, but all year-long.

All Year Long by Michael W Smith

This Christmas season I wish you joy
The wonder in every girl and boy
I  wish you gladness, the warmth and cheer
Of good friends and family gathered near

May children’s laughter in falling snow
Rekindle those  sweet scenes from long ago
May every carol, each candle bright
Remind  you why angels sang that night

If trouble finds you, this is my  prayer
May peace come into your hearts and make you strong
 And I wish you luck, the kind to last all year-long

Why is it when you try to help some people you just get your head bitten off and they go all defensive about what they’re saying it what they are trying to do?

As you’ll be aware if you’ve been reading my blog for a while, my Dad suffers from dementia and so I’ve been doing my best to support and help my Mum as much as possible, particularly over the last 12 weeks or so while Dad was in hospital. I’ve been trying my best but much of the time it has felt like my best just isn’t good enough, as no matter how much I’ve tried to help and support my Mum, she’s made me feel at time like I’m not helping, or that I’m saying things that aren’t helpful, and so she gets annoyed me with.

I know Mum doesn’t mean it to come across like this, as I know she does appreciate my help and support, it’s simply that she’s finding it difficult to come to terms with the fact that Dad will never be home again, and after more than 55 years of marriage that must be so hard for Mum to cope with. So I guess it’s simply been that me saying things as they really are is hard for mum to hear as she’s still finding it difficult to accept how things are with dad these days.

No matter what people say or do sometime when you try to help them, don’t ever stop trying to help them, as often those in most need are those who “push” those trying to help them away.

Stay strong and continue to reach out to those in need.

Ten weeks ago today I was at work when I got a phone call from my Mum to tell me Dad was being taken into hospital because he was dehydrated, as he was refusing to eat or drink very much. Ten weeks on and Dad’s still in hospital.

Dad’s been in I think, 5 different wards over that period, albeit the last two have been because he climbed out of bed a couple of weeks after he went into hospital, fell, hit his head and gave himself a cracker of a black eye, as well as fracturing his hip! This resulted in him having to be moved to another ward as he had to have an operation to fix his broken hip. He’s now in the hip fracture rehabilitation ward where he’s doing ok as far as his hip is concerned.

Initially when Dad went into hospital we were over there every day visiting him, which was very hard work for me with working full-time and then going straight from there to the hospital and not getting home until 8 or 9pm at night. Fortunately after a few weeks of this Mum realised this was too much for both of us, so we now just visit Dad every couple of days.

I know Mum wishes she could visit Dad every day, but to be honest, due to Dad’s dementia, he has no concept of how frequently or infrequently we visit, and in fact during many of our visits, refuses to speak to us or even open his eyes, as he’s happy to sleep all the time. Mum misses Dad greatly, which is only natural after more than 55 years of marriage, however Mum was no longer coping with Dad at home and we had already started proceedings to get Dad into a nursing home full-time, so Dad not being at home anymore, was always going to happen soon anyway, it’s just hospital he’s ended up in initially.

Even although it’s my Dad we’re visiting, I’m sorry to say I find it quite a chore. Don’t think it’s because I don;t love my Dad because I do, but as far as I’m concerned my Dad “died” a few years ago when his dementia meant he didn’t know me any more and he could no longer have a sensible conversation with us. Much of the time when we visit Dad he just sleeps, or sit/lies with his eyes shut unwilling to talk  or look at us. Mum is still making comments to Dad as if he’s going to get better and as if he can logically understand where he is and why. It’s sad but also frustrating.

I’m physically and emotionally shattered most of the time these days as it’s hard work working full-time and then spending time visiting someone in hospital and just sitting there for an hour or more without being able to have a conversation with them.

I feel really guilty for feeling like this, after all, it is my Dad I’m talking about, but sadly Dad isn’t going to get any better, so it’s only going to get harder.

Hopefully Dad will not be in hospital too much longer. Although he will never be home again, as he will only be discharged from hospital when he’s able to go straight into the nursing home which is just a few minutes away from Mum. At least when this happens, Mum will be able to go visit Dad whenever she wants and as frequently as she wants, without necessarily needing me to give her a lift.

So 10 weeks and counting…it’s been a long 10 weeks, but at least we know Dad’s in good hands and getting the best possible medical care.

I’ve said it before, but I make no apology for saying it again…dementia is a cruel illness.

As you’ll know if you’ve been following by blog posts for a wee while, my Dad suffers from vascular dementia and has been cared for at home by my Mum 24/7. However a few weeks ago we initiated the process with Social Work to get Dad into a nursing home full-time (you can read more about this in Time To Help…Please!).

Mum’s really been struggling to cope with caring for Dad full-time as he is now totally reliant on Mum to do everything for him…including the simple things we all do without thinking because they’re just straightforward basic tasks. For someone who has dementia, simple everyday tasks which we all normally do without thinking, become strange and alien to them. e.g. washing themself, dressing, feeding themself.

This last week my Dad would not eat or drink anything more than just a couple of mouthfuls of food or liquid, so on Wednesday Mum called in our GP, and he got Dad admitted to hospital as he was suffering from dehydration. While I’m sad my Dad’s ended up in hospital, it is the best place for him and for Mum, as it takes the pressure off Mum caring for him but also means he’s getting professional care. Having now had discussions with the doctor at the hospital and then with Dad’s social worker, it looks like Dad will now remain in hospital until there is free space for him at a local nursing home. That means Dad will now go straight into a nursing home from hospital…he will never be home again…

I’m fine about Dad going into a nursing home as he really needs the level of help they can offer him there, although when I think about the fact that Dad will probably never be home again I find that very upsetting. I try to remind myself though that while Dad is still alive, his body is still here, but the person who was my Dad really left a long time ago…

As far as Mum is concerned, she seems a bit more relaxed now as if a burden has been lifted from her. I know she still feels guilty about Dad going into care, however as hubby and me, Dad’s social worker and various others have said to her, it’s not that she’s failed Dad in any way, it’s simply that she’s done her best up to now caring for him, but he now needs more care than Mum is able to provide for him. When Dad was admitted to hospital on Wednesday Mum was fine about it as she realised it was what was best for Dad, and continued to be ok about it all until we went to visit Dad last night…

When we went into the ward to see Dad, he was lying on his bed slouched down with his head off his pillow, sleeping…he looked small and frail…and I think that was when it all hit Mum…she got quiet upset seeing Dad like that. Although he was actually a bit better last night than he’d been since he went into hospital as he actually answered us a few times when we spoke to him…not necessarily with comprehensible answers, but at least he answered us! Dad might have spoken to us tonight, but he didn’t know who Mum or I were, and no matter how long that has happened for I still find that sad and upsetting…though I can’t imagine how Mum must feel having been married to him for over 55 years!

Dementia is a cruel illness which robs the sufferer of their personality and leaves them almost like an empty body. I don’t think people really understand how dementia affects the sufferer and their family/friends until you’ve actually experienced it yourself…I hope you never will!

In conclusion, can I ask you to help me raise money for Alzheimer’s Scotland as they do a great job supporting and helping Alzheimer/dementia sufferers in Scotland.JustGiving - Sponsor me now!Thank you

It’s been just over a week I’ve been off work on annual leave, however, as usual when it’s almost time to go back to work, I wish I had another week off!

I gave you some idea of what I’ve been up to during my time off in Friday’s blog post entitled Normal Service Is Resumed. It’s been good not to be at work, however I must admit it’s not really felt like much of a rest as I’ve found it quite stressful spending everyday with mum!

Don’t get me wrong I love Mum and wouldn’t have wanted her to spend this last week on her own while Dad was in a care home for respite care. However due to all she’s having to cope caring for Dad, as well as us both dealing with my Dad’s and my Aunt’s guardianships, she offloads onto me as she is struggling to cope with it all. That’s fine with me as I’d rather she did that than try to cope on her own, however I’m finding it quite hard to cope too, as I too have a lot going on just now:

  • Concerned about Dad due to his dementia getting notably worse
  • Mum’s health because she’s still caring for Dad at home 24/7
  • Hubby’s health
  • Hubby’s job situation (early retirement/voluntary severance effective the end of this month)
  • My own on-going health worries – I’ve not really shared the extent of this with Mum as don’t want her to worry, as she’s enough to cope with!

I hope I don’t sound as though I’m complaining because I don’t intend too, I know life was never meant to be easy, so I’m simply just trying to give you an idea of some of the things I’m trying to cope with in my life at present, so you understand better the person writing this blog.

Mum asked me just yesterday if I had enjoyed my busy week off work and whether I was looking forward to going back to work for a rest! Maybe she’s more aware more than I think, about how I’m feeling and when I’m exhausted, struggling and in pain…

During my time off, when I’ve been struggling, I’ve found myself drawn again to the song Praise You In This Storm by Casting Crowns. Just like the words of this song say, I do wish that I was through this storm by now, however I thank God every day that I despite all I’ve been going through, I am still able to praise Him!

So it’s back to work tomorrow, and I’m pleased to say that today (Sunday), I finally got a day of doing absolutely nothing (typically I have a day of doing nothing when the weather is fantastic, but hey I needed it!)…and it was fabulous! Anyway I’m sure once I’m back at work tomorrow my week off will soon feel like was a distant memory by 10am!

I think it’s time to start planning another week or two off work!

If you’ve been following my Tweets in the last week, you’ll be aware that I’ve been on holiday from work since Thursday of last week. The main reason I took the time off was because last Thursday my Dad, who suffers from vascular dementia was going into a local care home for a week’s respite care, to give my Mum a break – My Mum still cares for Dad 24/7 at home, and has been finding it increasingly difficult to cope.

So last Thursday afternoon, Mum and I took Dad to the care home. When we got there, we were waiting for Dad’s assigned carer to come and get us and take us to Dad’s room to get him settled in, when Dad burst out crying…it was heartbreaking to see, and Mum got a bit upset, but it was simply because Dad didn’t know where he was (despite us telling him lots of times) or why he was there (again, despite us having told him a number of times).

So we got Dad settled into his room, and Joan, his assigned carer said she’d take Dad along to the day room and get him a cup of tea and a biscuit, so Mum decided we should just go then, rather than stay and confuse Dad. As we were getting ready to go, Mum told Dad we’d be back to take him home in a week so he just had to stay here for a few days. Dad’s response to this was, “Thank goodness for that, as I don’t want to stay here!”. Probably not the best thing Mum could have heard before we left Dad, but then we have to remember that in 2 minutes time Dad will have forgotten what we’ve told him anyway. Having said that it didn’t stop Mum getting a wee bit upset again as we left Dad – It must be hard after being married for well over 50 years and now seeing Dad like this…

Anyway, onto cheerier things…over the last week while Dad was in the care home, I spent some time with Mum every day, either going for a meal and/or going to various shopping centres for a wander round the shops, as well as doing our usual weekly supermarket shopping. The first couple of days Mum still seemed quite tense and stressed, although after that I think she began to relax and seemed to enjoy her “free-time“, even although every day she did still tell me she missed Dad.

Before we knew it, the week was over and so yesterday (Thursday) it was time to go back to the care home and collect Dad and bring him home. When I got over to Mum and Dad’s to pick Mum up to head down to the care home, Mum seemed quite stressed and was quite nippy with me several times, although maybe that was because she was worried about Dad as the care home had phoned her this morning to say Dad had a urine infection. Mind you they’s told her there was a prescription ready for Dad at our health centre, and instead of just leaving it there so we could pick it up when we were on our way to the care home to collect Dad, Mum got a bus down to the health centre this morning and collected the prescription and then got the medication at the chemist! I was a wee bit annoyed at her for that as she has a sore back/hip and so walking to/from the bus/health centre would not have done her back/hip much good…particularly when we could easily have collected it on our way past the health centre to the care home!

When we got to the care home, Dad was sitting in the day room with several other folk, with some music playing in the background. The worst thing about it was Dad didn’t know who Mum was! He seemed to know he knew her, but she had to explain who she was…that was sad. We brought Dad home, and all the way home in the car and when we got back to their house, he kept telling us he had no idea where he was, where he was going or why…that was sad.

When we got back to Mum and Dad’s house Mum opened the door and went in, Dad just stood on the doorstep – Mum told him to come in, and he said he’d come in in a minute. Mum told him to come in again, and Dad got annoyed and shouted,”Alright I’ll come in then!” – Argument number 1 already.

It funny in a sad way, as Mum and Dad very rarely ever argued when I was growing up, and when they did it was usually over something I had done (or not done!). However these days, Dad does get quite annoyed and a bit verbally aggressive towards Mum at times, but although we know it’s simply one of the side-effects of his dementia, it’s still upsetting for Mum.

So Dad’s back home with Mum again. I just hope that this last week when Dad’s had his week’s respite care, that I have been able to help Mum relax and recharge, so she is able to care for Dad at home again. It’s been a tough week for Mum not having Dad with her, but knowing she needed a break and that he’s getting well looked after. It’s also been a tough week for me, as I am finding it hard trying to stay positive and strong for Mum (as well as for hubby with his illness), I’m not complaining just wanting to point out to you all that when someone in your family suffers from dementia, it not only affects their carer(s), but their whole family.

Mum tells me she prays for patience a lot, and I can understand why, as I too pray for patience daily. Although we both need patience in different ways, I am sure God can, and will, answer our prayers for patience.

I’d ask that if you are a praying kind of person, you pray for my Mum and Dad, and that Mum will find the patience and strength to provide the care dad needs, without detriment to her own health. Thank you.

In Wednesday’s paper, the Herald, there was a very poignant article by Sally Magnusson entitled Magnusson’s torment at mother’s dementia battle. It really hit home for both Mum and me, and I’m sure many other’s who have family members or friends, who are suffering from dementia.

As you’ll know if you’ve been following my blog for a while, my Dad was diagnosed with dementia a few years ago, and over the last couple of years his condition has deteriorated very rapid. My Dad is still living at home with my Mum, with my Mum caring for him 24/7.

As Sally Magnusson says in her article in the Herald this week

Caring for my mother at home, even only part-time in my case with the help of my sisters and latterly a team of wonderful carers, has been psychologically gruelling and physically draining,” she said.

“How much worse for those who are caring alone and cannot afford extra help.”

when you’re caring for someone with dementia, it’s not something which just takes up a small part of your time, it is a 24/7 job, one which is not just physically exhausting, but also emotionally draining.

Please don’t think dementia is just about forgetting a few things, it’s not, it’s a horrendous disease which sucks out the person you know from their body and leaves an empty, helpless shell. It’s a disease which not only affects the person with the disease but also those who care for them, as there’s no remission for them from looking after the sufferer.

The person I know my Dad to be isn’t here anymore, yes, when I look at him I see my Dad, but that’s about the only part of him which is still recognisable as Dad:

  • He is no longer able to dress himself – Mum has to help him do that
  • He no longer knows or understands how to wash himself – Mum does that 6 days a week with a carer coming in to give Dad a bath once a week
  • He doesn’t recognise family members…including me which was very upsetting when it first happened. Although I’m now used to him not knowing me, it still is very upsetting
  • He doesn’t recognise or know people he’s known for years, such as neighbours and friends
  • When outside the house, he doesn’t know where he is
  • He sleeps most of the time

One of the saddest things watching Dad’s condition worsen, was when he went through a stage of bursting out crying for no apparent reason, other than just simply frustration at what was happening to him. I know how upsetting it was for Mum and me to see, but imagine how my Dad must have felt!

I do my best to support my Mum as she cares for Dad 24/7, however I never feel as though I’m able to do enough because I can see how difficult it is for Mum. On the plus side, Dad’s been into a local care hom,e a couple of time in the last 4/5 months for a week’s respite care, which has allowed Mum to get a bit of a break and a rest. In the last few weeks Mum’s talked about how she’s not sure how much longer she will be able to look after Dad at home.

It’s sad it’s come to this for Dad, but for the sake of my Mum, and her health, I was pleased when Mum told me she had asked her social worker to put Dad’s name down on the waiting list for the local care home. It’s upsetting to think of Dad not being at home, but ultimately he doesn’t really know where he is or who he’s with anymore, so as long as he’s comfortable and being looked after well, that is all I can ask.

If you are a praying person, can I ask you to pray for all those suffering from dementia and also for those caring for them. Thank you.