For those who never have children, is it possible to ever truly come to terms with desperately wanting a child, but never having one?
It can be incredibly disappointing to realise or be told that you’re never going to have a child – You just want to be like everyone else, but you’re not, you can’t do all the same things all your friends with children can. You try to hide your disappointment that your life hasn’t worked out as you’d hoped.
Sadly the reaction of others (an example of which I described in Childless #1) can, even without them even realising, make us feel even worse, increasing the feeling of failure or shame. Even the closest of relationships can become strained during these times…and you begin to realise you’re being “left out” of things, as your friends who have children are off on trips/visits together on child oriented days out. That is hard to accept, as it’s as if you’ve become a social pariah all because society expects you to have children!
So just as I said in Childless #1, don’t be shocked or disgusted if they don’t, as you don’t know why they don’t have children, and your reaction may leave them feeling inadequate, hurt or broken, and that is heartbreaking.